“He said between me and the cats, I would go first,” Murphy said. “I was really sick. My lungs would swell up.”

Another example of the litigious society the U.S. has become. There’s a lot of really bad off color puns I could make in regard to this story but, I’ll save everyone the groans.

MET MAN'S PET PEEVE. This is one of those stories that seems like it should be accompanied by the headline being set in a “bleeding” typeface (a la Tales of the Crypt) accompanied by one of those dramatically lit worm’s eye views of someone engulfed by terror.